Codependency: Being dependent on others’ dependency by Marc Handelman, PhD

There may not be a simple test, or a clear marker, but if you consistently put someone else’s needs first, to the detriment of your own, you may be codependent. What is the boundary around codependency and how do you work through it? Continue reading–>

Expect the unexpected: Living with alcoholics or dysfunctional families by Marc Handelman, PhD

Dysfunctional families teach you a lot: don’t tell; don’t have friends over; keep a close watch for signs of an explosion; try not to be noticed; be ready to fix everything. Life is chaotic, unpredictable, and violent. Many people need psychotherapy. Many people find comfort and support from self-help and recovery groups such as ACOA, Al-Anon, and CODA. Continue reading–>

Trauma and dissociation by Marc Handelman, PhD

Dissociation is not just related to the external world, it is also fundamentally a disconnection from oneself. It is an important task of psychotherapy to help the traumatized individual integrate these disconnected aspects of self. Addressing what may have felt unbearable can be painful, and the work must not push too hard or the person is at risk of being retraumatized or finding themselves stuck, once again, in an overwhelming and intolerable place.  Continue reading–>

Therapy and the 12 steps by Marc Handelman, PhD

Twelve-step programs and psychotherapy are not mutually exclusive. Rather, they can reinforce each other and provide help for you as a whole person. While there is some overlap, and there are some differences between the two, the differences are not in conflict. In fact, they can provide synergy to promote your overall welfare spiritually, emotionally, socially, and physically. Continue reading–>

Trauma and memory by Marc Handelman, PhD

For people who have experienced a trauma, the issue of memory — and trusting memory — is particularly difficult, and carries an incredible weight and importance. When a traumatic event happens, the experience can be dissociated. When the events were happening in the past, people may have told you that they were not happening. Continue reading–>